"what is HE teaching you lately?" Well, a multitude of things, but the biggest/most prominent right now is about idols. The best definition I have ever heard for idol was:
"An idol is something I am willing to sin to get or willing to sin because I can't have it"
I've always heard and believed that idols could be anything...from a statue of a Buddha or a kachina doll to money/fame to people whether famous people or your children and/or spouse. I think I knew to that to be loved/accepted/important were also things that could be idols. I knew/know that ultimately every idol that a I/you have in our lives leads back to me/you. ( hope that makes sense) Over the last couple of days I have come to the realization, in my own life, that I am my own idol (that is very hard to admit). I did a lot of thinking and praying yesterday and came to the conclusion that the majority of what I do or don't do, I do for me...specifically my comfort and convenience. I am ashamed. I am asking God to make me truly repentant, to change my heart...to be honest these are scary prayers because they go against my desire for comfort and convenience. I don't think I have ever felt such a spiritual battle going on in my heart...it hurts but at the same time I know that God isn't going to leave me here...why else would He reveal this to me if He wasn't going to change me and make me ready for change. I'm standing on the promises that God is faithful, merciful and gracious. I'm thankful for His goodness in revealing myself to me. I pray I will continue to be open to His severe mercy.
1 comment:
That's something Mary Alice (our retreat speaker) said she loves most...the promise that God will not leave you where you are!
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